Random thoughts 859

i never pretend to kid myself
about the risks in this game
Life, learning, loving
all while inebriated in
myths and illusions
becoming disillusioned
mentally mutated by
fast foods and commercials

the haves and have nots
the desire for
power, prestige
we no longer feel the need to
liberate ourselves from ourselves or
forsake our greed
i just wanna be loved

people make the world go round
and so does money
ain’t it funny how time flies when you’re
busy whoring yourself in the streets
giving head to your boss?
but bills must be paid

but giving head to random people
is something else, something deeper
steeper like internet phone sex
late nights in back allies outside
no pride just addicted to
the need to feel wanted and to feel something
another heart beat
pulse
breath
you look in their tired eyes and wonder to self
“what if?”
but like all addictions no regard to post conditions
in the moment like a sky diver falling from above
the rush of an orgasm
a hit of coke it
numbs the brain
on your knees again
ain’t it funny

the solution is not
who what when where nor how
but why
why do we feel the need to dictate
who we give our love to or decide
for others

no holding hands with the person
who makes me blossom not only in my pants
or who makes me wanna make homemade pancakes
and serve it in bed
we said no they said no he said no she said no
I saY save me from this life

back allies and dark living rooms
back seats and couches with sheets draped across
all feeling lost, numb, for the moment
I'm here with someone who may never meet my mom
and she doesn’t know I do coke

She’ll never meet all my friends
Maybe because we were never friends
She and i
Not friends like classmates and those
blessed to you by “hello” or coincidence and not birth
the kind you can tell anything to
and not feel the weight of judgment

Disappointment and regret
Advise and guide don’t despise and lie
Understand and love and hug
Don’t point and scream and suck teeth and
sigh with grief while rolling eyes

We make it hard for ourselves as a collective
Just check things out from a different perspective
And trust that God don’t make mistakes
Life is just as good as a bowl of Frosted Flakes
With cold milk and the feeling of love and belonging
And being free to be the best you you can be

I know it’s cliché but sometimes that’s not a bad thing
It’s as simple as whistling Dixie backed by a chorus singing
I love you, you love me, we’re a happy family
with a great big hug and a kiss from me to you…think about it...